Looking back to my freshman year of High School during quarantine and distance learning, it wasn’t all bad. Many who I have spoken to whether they liked or disliked distance learning told me that they were not very fond of distance learning because they missed their friends and were not able to focus on work while staying at home. I will agree with them on that, I did not like being at home too some days because I could not concentrate, and I felt like I was becoming a slouch. My mental health during that time was not the best, but I was able to manage it. I would wake up at 6:45am to start my day off and I would enjoy this because my classes did not start until 9:00am which gave me plenty of time to make breakfast or try new recipes. Being at home gave me the opportunity to focus on things I enjoyed doing like riding my bike, painting, drawing, playing volleyball, and cooking. The downside was that my social skills became worse. I was already a socially awkward child and just distancing myself from others made me even more.
My first day of sophomore year was filled with tissues since I was sick, but I still wanted to come to school since it was the first day back in person, and I missed my friends. No, I did not have COVID. I was scared that the teachers were going to kick me out of school for being sick with the common cold, and of my classmates fearing me getting them sick. My sophomore year was not filled with many days like these though. I was finally able to get to interact with my other classmates. To be honest I was going through a phase in my sophomore year. I was unhappy and I didn’t allow myself to feel happy because “I did not deserve to be happy.” I felt guilty for being happy for things that I did in the past and now looking back at it, it was not okay for me to do that. I choose to be unhappy most of the time. What I failed to acknowledge at that time was that I had the power to choose how I could take things, but part of me knows that I had to go through that in order to look back at it like this and give others advice.
I have no words to describe my junior year. It was absolutely my worst year, but I do miss it at times. The summer going into my junior year I remember being stressed out about my AP summer work because I wanted to do my absolute best that year, but since I was not used to the workload and how demanding it was, I had a complete breakdown the first week. The reason for my breakdown was from not feeling confident in my abilities of being able to keep up with everything that all my teachers were demanding. I would also like to give a special thanks to Mrs. Bhatti who was the reason for my many breakdowns, but I will admit that she made me a better writer. After surviving Mrs. Bhatti’s AP Lang class I felt like I could overcome everything. I remember second semester of my junior year dissecting the stinky cat in physio, going to IM3 math, and not understanding anything, AP French with Mr. Costa and enjoying learning French with my friends, AP Lang with Mrs. Bhatti and doing a timed write, Government with Mrs. Smith was always fun. After 5th I would go to Coach Chavez’s room to study before heading down to Kaiser High School to practice, which was something else. This is when it starts getting good though, during February Darnell Kunitomi from Los Angeles Times came to speak to us during Lang where the idea of starting a school newspaper started.
The summer going into our senior year is when we started working on making The Steeler Chronicle. We would go to the Lewis Library and brainstorm ideas on how the newspaper would function. We managed to get the website and the groundwork of the club thanks to Ashley Diaz the Vice President to which I owe a lot for helping me make this happen. At first, we had problems publishing the articles on time and getting members to write them, which we still have, but we got better. In the beginning of first semester when we had more issues, I remember not being too close with Ashley and allowing to handle all of the workload on her own because she said she would manage but let me tell you that she can indeed manage it, but this girl needs someone to tell her to stop and take a break.1
Setting aside all this newspaper business, I would like to add that senior year is stressful in its own way as you are dealing with your usual class load while having to figure out your future at the same time. It is like you have finally gotten used to the rhythm of how school actually works to that completely changing. You then must find another path you have to take which is scary. I know it is scary, but we will be fine. To be honest I am even finding it hard believing that I will be fine. I am scared I will fail in college, won’t adapt well, or do anything with my life. I know these worries that I am having are worries that many go through at one point in our lives which makes it a bit better that this all part of the process. A valuable lesson I learned this year is not to care about what others think of you because at the end of the day the only thing that matters is how you view yourself because you will always end up displeasing someone, so do whatever is best for you. Those that truly value you as a person will understand you and will stay with you through thick and thin.
I hope my mini story can help someone at least well, this is goodbye for now. This is Cielo Aguirre, The Steeler Chronicle president, signing out!
Much love to my friends <3
About the Contributors
Cielo Aguirre
Cielo Aguirre, Staff Writer
Cielo Aguirre is the president of The Steeler Chronicle. She is either found in the library with her nose stuck between a romance novel or running away from her problems if she isn’t injured. If found, please help her find her way.
editors note: I’ll rest when I retire!!! -ashley